Week 9 Post 1: Difficult Conversations

Difficult conversations are a thing that nobody wants to have, however it is almost guaranteed that you are going to engage in one no matter what field you work in, especially healthcare. Some sources of difficult conversations as a leader could be delivering bad news, discussing a sensitive or political topic, or talking about a project that was unsuccessful. These types of conversations cause stress and anxiety, however it is important that you address the topic and engage in the difficult conversation rather than avoiding it.

I found an article in the Harvard Business Review that gives 7 tips on how to deal with difficult conversations. The 7 tips are as follows: (taken directly from https://hbr.org/2009/03/7-tips-for-difficult-conversat) 

1. Keep your goals realistic. You can’t ever eliminate the stress you’ll feel around telling your supplier you’re cutting back, but you can reduce it. Spend your energy on preparation – focus on developing your specific script.
2. Give bad news upfront. Tough messages should be simply and clearly stated in the first sentence.
3. Adopt the “And Stance”. Take control of the conversation by pre-empting distractions, objections and blame by using “and”. “I know you worked all night, and I know you want to do well, and I know you just joined the company, and I know the graphics people sometimes get the data wrong, and I know I could have been clearer in my directions to you….” And, and, and.
4. Get out of the “blame frame.” Each person involved in the situation has a different objective story about what happened. Your goal is not to judge who’s right and wrong, it’s to manage to better outcomes in the future.
5. Paraphrase. To create clarity and to let people know you’re genuinely listening, summarize what they’re telling you — and ask them to do the same.
6. Be prepared for bad reactions. Finger-pointing, denial, arguments and tears are all possible outcomes of tough conversations. You cannot control the other person’s reactions, but you can anticipate them, and be emotionally ready.
7. Pretend it’s 3 months or 10 years from now. Put the difficult conversation in perspective by thinking about the future. The conversations that are hardest right now will seem less daunting.

I believe that these are definitely useful tips in order to make difficult conversations easier and less anxiety filled. I will certainly keep these points of advice in mind for when I have to engage in a difficult conversation in the future.